35 Thoughts Every Recent Grad Has After Entering the “Real World”

I think it’s safe to say that while college might prepare us for the professional world mentally, it does not completely prepare us emotionally. As a recent post-grad, I think a lot of things while I sit in my cubicle and type away every day. The career life is wonderful, but that doesn’t mean it’s always easy.

1. Please hire me.
2. Look Mom and Dad, I have a real job!
3. I make so much money! Time to go shopping.
4. OMG, I have no money.
5. Do I really need to start saving for retirement now?
6. What’s a 401k?
7. I need nicer clothes.
8. Oh no, my boss wants to meet with me. Did I do anything wrong?
9. I think someone just saw me take a selfie.
10. Where’s the coffee?
11. I don’t make enough money.
12. Taxes suck.
13. Have I really been on BuzzFeed for thirty minutes?
14. I hate waking up early.
15. I love my desk chair. It rolls. And swivels.
16. Is it time for happy hour?
17. Why can’t I hold my liquor anymore?
18. I love wine.
19. I miss sweatpants.
20. When am I going to be able to afford a Bentley?
21. Thank the Lord I have a job.
22. Hand cramp. I have carpal tunnel.
23. Coffee. Stat.
24. Please God, don’t let anyone come to my desk today.
25. Maybe I should start a side hustle to make more money.
26. I can hear my coworkers breathing.
27. My back hurts. I need to sit up straighter.
28. Will I get in trouble for napping under my desk?
29. Pinterest counts as research, right?
30. I’m so tired of typing.
31. Are there any donuts?
32. Are these pants a little tight?
33. I hate whoever brought donuts.
34. Is it five o’clock yet?
35. Ahhh, wine.

• Category: Careers, Watercooler